Superman
by memories of saturday
Summary: because you were always the best, and you better be back soon. i'll be right here waiting for you.


Tall, mysteriously dark, and Supermanly.

That's the description I always give whenever my close friends and other acquaintances ask me on how to describe my Superman. Was it pretty ordinary on your taste? Well I'm telling you it's not for me. It's not easy to be him. Let me tell you about Natsume, let me tell you about my Superman.

Every single day I watched him by the glass window in his room across mine. I'll see him walking in his sophisticated looking apartment as he carefully fix his stripped printed tie, creatively imagining myself as the one who is doing it for him. I can't help but give an involuntary smile as I watched him as he puts his papers in his briefcase and takes a sip on his hot coffee. I always wondered how it would feel to drink hot chocolates in the morning with him sitting beside me. And few more minutes of careful analysis in what he do every single day, I'll looked down towards the road and watch as he drives away, to save the world or go to work. It's the same thing to me.

He's got his mother's eyes, the same dazzling crimson red eyes that I love to see whenever I have the chance to, even sneak peeks at it could make my day. I wonder if he has the slightest idea that I intentionally walk a little too late from work just to match his time schedule every single day. Hoping that as usual, he would hit the brake pedal of his car and give me a ride on our way home. I love it when I learn things about him as he talk, the way his frown forms whenever I say something stupid, the way he states sarcastic punch lines, the way he'd open his car's door as he bid me goodbye. I always knew he is too special. And that made me wonder if I could ever match who he was, and who he'd be.

With his talent and his father's ambition, it was an easy thing for him to be the uppermost lawyer in this city. And the more he excel, the more complicated things gets. That got me, can I ever be as good as he is, and would I be good enough for him to see.

Does he see the stars I am looking up in the sky right now? I wonder if he knows how much that I miss him. How every time his petite broken promises set me on the edge, doesn't he know that I hang on every word he says? Do I stand a chance? I hope I do, or are we supposed to be forever friends? I hope we don't.

On Sundays, I would seat beneath the flowers of the Sakura tree near my apartment. I'd watch as how the petals would fall down, signaling the coming of winter in a few more weeks. And I'd throw glances at his place's direction. Hoping that in a few more seconds to tick, he would chastely appear and that when he is a few steps away, he will smirk and say "how are you?".

I'd chase my thoughts to reality as I remember how I see you in your office suite, how your scent fills the air, how his hair seemed so cool, looking unbrushed. Frisson once again engulfs me, an being much of a coward, I'd say "just fine." and in that moment, I know my time would stop again. There are just words deep inside me that I can't shoot straight to his face. I need help, I need courage.

I always forget to tell you I Love you. And I'll love you 'Forever'.

But this day is different. I knew it is. The way you throw unusually glances on your phone gets me goosebumps. It is like my instinct is telling me that something is huge coming up. With a few words about the case you are handling, and a few chuckles on my stupid joke with Ruka's new rooster pet, my questionable feeling was answered when your phone rings like my alarm clock. And within an instant you are a different person. With your phone on your hand, I can see the big things you are in at the moment. The hardest thing is, when you face me.

"I'd be transferred to the main office of our firm." And boy, I don't know how to react. I knew it was something you had always wanted; something you had been looking forward to in months and that it would be a very selfish thing for me to be pessimistic about it. But the main office is just too far from here and I knew very well it could easily kill my petty chance to ever be with you. Was I supposed to congratulate you or something? You seemed happy, and I know I should also be. You stood and offered me a hand, I accepted it, but at the back of my mind I know that sooner, you'd be a lot more distant than you are now. That maybe, the millimeter distance you have for me could turn out and be a centimeter or thousands of kilometers in the next time I bump into you in the streets. With your deadpanned look at me, I desperately wondered of what is running in that mind of yours as you turned your back and walk away, I think of the bright side, badly trying my best to find the reason for me to be happy about.

I watched superman fly away. I know you'd always do your best to help people who are in need. You should do your best, and better be the best. You were always the right one, I know you are and I would see you off, no matter how sad it may be. Because I know you've got a very busy day today, so go and save the world. And I'll be around. I'll be here whenever you'll need me. No matter how far you go, how long you'd be gone just come back and I'll be with you someday. I'll keep dreaming, and I'll be right here on the ground when you come back down.

He's beautiful, yet he's complicated. The way he had to take things into its best doesn't also help in the situation. Sometimes it gives me the ideas that my own imperfections are the mere reasons why we could never be more than friends, would he even face me if I wasn't one of his few friends from when we were young?. If my, a little too bubbly personality is acting as the most effective repellant towards him? I hope he wasn't too irrational to decide with those lowly reasons. No. I won't lose hope that someday he'll take me away and save the day. Yeah, he definitely would.

Something in deep red eyes has me saying, he's not all bad like his reputation and I can't hear one single word they say. They are not the one who keeps an eye on him. They are not the one who can see how he looks at things, and how he interact with the people around him. Everything they say mostly are assumptions, stupid thoughts merely formed from the way people see him in his profession. But he is not, and he'd never be. To me, he is the very same guy I see from my high school class. The same guy who, when asked by the teacher of what is the thing he wants in the world, would say 'justice'. And that is why I believe he has always been at his profession for.

But things are so just out of hand, just when I thought we are getting along with everything fine, things would have to happen. And you'll leave, got places to be. So you could reach out for your own dreams, and give a hand on a lot more of people who need help and I'll be here trying to be okay, or at least that is what I am telling everyone. I'd continue my life and think of what could have happen I don't always forget to tell you I love you. If I wasn't too much of a coward and tell you that you are the one whom fills my stomach with butterflies?

But it hurts too much? How could you do this to me? How could you possibly invite me in your goodbye party, be an angel and a demon at the same time? How could you even expect me to be the same happy Mikan, when you know since we were younger that you are the one I had mooned all about? You are unfair, and as wicked as you could be. Asking me to be happy, and making me stop waiting for you couldn't be possibly attainable. Instead, why can't you just tell me that you care, so that I could continue to pretend that I am content of what we have? By doing that you wouldn't have to go around and have trouble of telling everyone to look out for me while you are gone. I am not your pet; I am just your neighbor who happens to have extra free time to make a fool of herself to get your attention. And yes. I'd be good. And I'd you better be too.

And I'll watch superman fly away. You've got a busy day today. Go save the world, do what you need to do, I'll be around. Within a blink of an eye, you are The Natsume Hyuuga. News were spreading pretty fast, people who thought you are bad from pointless rumors seemed to learn facts. Everyone seems to know who you are, as famous as a superstar. With a few people knowing we are acquaintance. I just hope you don't chase another girl. You may be good looking and all, but please don't forget. Don't forget me and our sakura tree, me and the moments we used to share, me and the shows you used to hate. Don't forget about -me. I may be far away, but thousands of miles are nothing because I'll never let you go. And all the while I'm still lovestruck and looking at the window, don't forget. Don't forget about me.

Because a year might have passed but my love for you is still the same, no matter how things come out, it would always be the same. Right here I am, sitting on my orange sofa seat, wishing that the red flowers were from you. Wishing the little crumpled card was from you. Wishing the blinking lights on my phone was a call from you. Cause I love you from the very first day.

A lot of people love surprises, I was one of them. But your surprise was a different thing; it almost took my heart away from excitement. Never thought the bell on the door was ringed by you. And boy you don't need every one in the gang to make me say yes to you. cause my heart has always been meant beat just for you.

A/N: unless you haven't heard of TS superman in her album speak now, you should know that this is a songfic. ^_^ I love that song. And I am hoping you could spend a little of your time to hear it. Thanks for reading btw.

Disclaimer: I do not own GA. I do not of the lyrics of superman.


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